Crayola Attempts to Move White Crayon To Back of the Box
All other crayons of color applauded the decision to nullify ‘white privilege.’ Burnt Sienna remarked, “it’s about time…we’ve been together since 1903. It’s always been white in the front, me in the back. Not anymore. White’s not even a color.” Indian Red reminisced, “I remember when they evicted Maize back in 1990. I thought then, ‘why Maize? Shoulda been white…nobody uses white anyway.’”
Crayola executives admitted that they caved in to pressure from the National Association for the Advancement of Colored Crayons (NAACC) in making their bold and exclusive decision. “It remains every crayon’s responsibility to address the systemic underrepresentation of minority crayons the world over.”
There are rumors that White crayon plans to make a major announcement in the near future. It appears that White crayon will now identify as ‘handicapped’ and will change its name to ‘Albino.’ Not only will Crayola have to recognize Albino’s legitimate claim of color disability, but also will be forced to make accommodations to return Albino to its now lawful position…right back to the front of the box.